Hermitology 101

Are Hermits a genetically stimulated oddity or simply the product of neglect? What are the ingredients that make up a loner? I believe, If you take a taste of success, a scoop of love, add an ample portion of heartbreak, a certain amount of betrayal, stir in a pound of failure and a pinch of cornered rat, then blend into a bowl with low self esteem, mixed with a lack of confidence, throw in some self pity, a respect for nature and bake slowly for twenty years, you may then, be on the right track.

If there were courses in Hermitology, taught by the world’s leading Hermitologists, would you enroll? Of course not! Simply because the Hermitologists would not show up to enlighten and neither would you for that matter. Hermitedness is something, I believe, that follows a spontaneous path and is guided by events that occur outside the realm of predictability and common sense. I can’t claim to know any Hermits, which tells me they have successfully and skillfully succeeded in their quest of anonymity.

I do believe though, that I had a close encounter of the third kind with just such a recluse a few weeks back at the exit door of a large retail store in Gravenhurst. As I left the store I came close to knocking over an old timer, right out of the pages of Prospector’s Digest. He looked about seventy years old, with a full beard and very few teeth, not that this is a prerequisite for being a Hermit, but he could well have been typecast in the role. In fact he looked more like the perennial sidekick, Gabby Hayes than even Gabby himself. He had an amazed grin on his face as he watched the automatic door open and close, and said to no one in particular 'Ain’t that the darndest thing!' In true western gibberish! I couldn’t help but smile at the childlike amazement that lit up his face. It had to make anyone wonder where this man had been hiding for the past number of years. Being a romantic, I dismissed the possibility he was mentally challenged, but chose to think of him as a voluntary social dropout. How and where he lived, I could only speculate. A path, I’m guessing, the old fellow followed for years and for reasons only he knew. As I left the parking lot he remained transfixed as his head swung from side to side with every opening and closing of the magic door. I wasn’t sure what brought him to town, but I had a good idea what would drive him back into seclusion. The world was just moving too fast for his liking. Who knew what was waiting around the corner?

For those who would actively pursue this life style, be warned! Hermitedness cannot be created and is not contrived. It is usually gender specific, although the word Hermette has been used on occasion to describe self-exiled women. I’m sure a degree or doctorate must be earned with years of shattered dreams, broken promises and a general mistrust of fellow man, cultivated with bad decisions and developed to perfection with word fasts. So for those of you, who consider yourselves Hermitically inclined, lock your doors and your hearts and let it happen naturally. For those of you, male or female, teetering on the threshold but not yet ready to make the commitment... happy trails or seek help!

Dan Blix